Funny

God saw me hungry, he created pizza .
He saw me thirsty, he created pepsi .
He saw me in dark, he created light .
He saw me without problems, he created YOU.

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Twinkle Twinkle little star
You should know what you are
And once you know what you are
Mental hospital is not so far.
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TEACHER== Name four members of the cat family?
STUDENTS== Daddy cat,Mummy cat and two kittens !
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Police man== Stop, stop, your headlights are not working.
The Man== Move, move, even the brakes are not working.
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Why does history keep repeating it self?
Because we weren't listening the first time !
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A sardar ji pulled out 6 people from a burning house...
still he was in jail.......why?
coz all the 6 were firebrigade staff !
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An Astronomer was watching the sky from his telescope.
A sardar was observing him, Suddenly a star falls, seeings
that sardar shouted "kya nishana hai"
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"Doctor, doctor, will i be able to play the
violin after the operation?"
"yes of course...."
"Great ! i never could before"
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The rain makes all things beautiful. The grass and flowers too.
If rain makes all things beautiful why dosen't it rain on you?
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Roses are red, Violents are blue monkeys
like u should be kept in zoo.
Don't feel so angry you will find me there too
not in cage but laughing at you.
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When ur life is in darkness pray to God ask him to
free u from darkness and if after you pray and your
still in darkness, please pay your ELECTRICITY BILL !
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Someday u may lose ur hair.
u may lose ur teeth- ur money & even lose ur mind.
But 1 thing u will never loose is ur good looks.
coz u cant lose wot u don't have!
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When u feel sad....
To cheer up just go to the mirror and say,
"damn I am really so cute" u will overcome your sadness.
But don't make this a habit.....
Coz liars go to hell !!!!
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When the time comes for you to give your heart to someone make
sure that u select someone who will never break your heart coz
broken hearts have no spare parts.
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I see your face when I am dreaming
That's why I always wake up screaming
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Govt. of Pakistan has introduced a new rule
---> Good Looking people should be thrown out of the country!!!
You are safe..... Where should i hide?????

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I am getting married next week.

There will be small party and only a few people will be invited.

Don't brings any gifts. just brings SOMEONE to marry me.

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Galileo : Great Mind

Einstein : Genius Mind

Newton : Extraordinary Mind

Bill Gates : Brilliant Mind

ME : Master

Mind YOU : Never Mind

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Good Person : Its YOU

Good Friend : Its YOU

again Good Heart : That's YOU !

Good Will : Its also YOU !

Good Looking Ahh.... hold it.

Its 2 much 4 u..... Now its ME

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I wanted 2 kill the SWEETEST, SMARTEST

& the most beautiful person on the earth,

but then I thought.........

SUICIDE is a crime.

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I Look at the moon, the moon is beautiful...

I look at you... I... I...I'd

rather look at the moon again...
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Why do we drink water ?

Because we cannot eat it.

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Dad : Son, what do you want for your birthday?

Son : Not much dad, just a radio

with a sports car around it.

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The more you study.

The more you know.

The more you know.

The more you forget.

The more you forget.

The less you know.

So why study?

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A SARDARJI is in the library ,

he bangs down a book and says :" too boring,

too many characters and no story.

LIBRARIAN says : oh! U r the one who took the phone directory away??
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Good looking people r hard to find.

That's why u don't ......

That's y u don't see me often.
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Look at the world as one big chocolate cake.

It would never be complete without few sweets n nuts.

Sweets like ME and nuts like YOU.

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I wrote your name on sand it got washed.
I wrote your name in air,it was blown away.then
I wrote your name on my heart & i got Heart Attack .

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Twinkle Twinkle little star
You should know what you are
And once you know what you are
Mental hospital is not so far.